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NEUTRALIZING APPROACHES

There are three basic approaches to resolving trauma (that I know of).
The bottom-up approach, the top-down approach and a combination of the two.

  1. Bottom-Up
    The bottom-up approach focuses on the body and calming the nervous system first.
    When the body and nervous system have calmed down, then the mental or emotional work of identifying and neutralizing the underlying trauma can be done.

    The bottom-up approach works best for most people I have met.
    Some people need to lean heavily into de-escalating (calming) first; otherwise, the emotional pain is too great or their thoughts are bouncing all over the place, making it impossible to get a handle on what the real underlying issue is.

  2. Top-Down
    The top-down approach is doing the emotional or mental work of identifying and neutralizing the underlying trauma first, and then the nervous system naturally calms down and gets regulated as a result.

    The top-down approach works best for me.
    I can move quickly or immediately into neutralizing with little to no de-escalation first, finding that my nervous system calms down as soon as I have done the emotional or mental work of neutralizing the past trauma.

    However, if my triggered reaction is very intense, I will sometimes need to take a bottom-up approach by doing Safety Cues or other De-Escalation techniques first.
    The intensity of my trigger will determine how much de-escalation I need to do to calm my nervous system down before I can start to uncover and neutralize the anchor.

  3. Combo
    It is possible to combine de-escalation and neutralizing and do them at the same time.

    De-escalating can be added to practically any neutralizing technique, and addressing past trauma can be added to practically any de-escalation technique. It is possible to combine de-escalation and neutralizing and do them at the same time.

    The most common way is to add rhythm - which is very calming and grounding to the nervous system - to a neutralizing technique.

    Many neutralizing techniques can be done while walking, hiking, jogging, running, cycling or swimming (adding bilateral rhythm).

    EMDR is a neutralizing technique, which has rhythm built into it in the form of bilateral (side to side) movements. These rhythmic bilateral movements can be side-to-side eye movements (without moving your head), sound, vibration, touch (such as crossing your arms and alternately patting each shoulder or upper arm with the palm of your hand or alternately patting your thighs with your hands), or alternating footsteps while walking or running.










NEUTRALIZING TECHNIQUES

Although de-escalating triggers is soothing and helps us regain some access to our cortex, we might still be in danger of causing harm until we have uncovered the past trauma and neutralized it. Until then, we could still be subconsciously seeing the current situation through the filter of the past and be unable to respond appropriately.

There are many techniques that can help us identify and neutralize (resolve) past trauma.

Which technique(s) a person will like is a matter of personal preference.

Not every technique will work for every person or work for a person every time.

Over time I have tried many techniques and witnessed many others in action.

I like to work with one technique for a while. Then another technique might become my new go-to technique for a while.

It usually just takes one technique to neutralize an anchor for me,
but sometimes I need to use more than one technique or use more than one handle.

I have found that I can also use these techniques to neutralize limiting beliefs picked up randomly in life, not just from past trauma.

I find it is helpful for most people to be guided through a technique a few times before attempting to do it on their own.

If any of the techniques bring up something that is too difficult for me to deal with at that time, I can always stop the process and do some Safety Cues and other De-Escalation techniques to soothe my nervous system. Or call someone to get grounded again.

One time I had a negative experience with Self-EMDR. It brought up something too big for me to deal with on my own. It disrupted the rest of my day. (I did not know Safety Cues back then.) The next day I was back to normal.
Although that experience was very difficult, I did not feel harmed by it.

Some people need to work with a professional when attempting to uncover and neutralize past trauma.

Here is a list of some neutralizing techniques and modalities that I know about:


    Bottom-Up:
  1. Somatic Experiencing (SE) created by Peter Levine
    Website Link: SE 101
    There are many SE practitioners.



    2. Combo:
  2. EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization & Reprocessing) created by Francine Shapiro
    Doing EMDR with a trained professional, at first, is generally recommended.
    Overview Link: About EMDR

    A self-EMDR process is described in the book And So We Begin by James M. (page 61)

  3. Re-Evaluation Counseling (RC) created by Harvey Jackins
    Website Link: Origins of RC
    Website Link: About RC



    4. Top-Down:
  4. Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS) created by Richard Schwartz
    Website Link: IFS Model
    Website Link: About IFS

  5. Family Constellations Therapy created by Bert Hellinger
    Website Link: What Is Family Constellations?

  6. Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT) created by Marisa Peer

  7. TAT™ (Tapas Acupressure Technique) created by Tapas Fleming
    Website Link: tatlife.com
    Video: What is TAT?
    TAT Demonstration Video by Tapas Fleming: TAT pose and stoppers... with Tapas Fleming

  8. Completion Process created by Teal Swan
    Book Link: The Completion Process Book
    Website Link: 12-Step Completion Process Outline
    Video: Completion Process
    Video: Triggers - Emotions
    Video: Unhook the perception of threat

  9. Graduation Exercise - described in the book And So We Begin by James M. (pages 57-58)

  10. Thought Rhyming (part of Immanuel Journaling) - a Christian-based journaling exercise
    Book Link: Joyful Journey: Listening to Immanuel
    Informative Website: presenceandpractice.com
    Worksheet Link: Worksheet - See Part B

  11. ABC Tool (a SMART Recovery tool) - a Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy (REBT) Approach
    Website Link: About ABC
    Video: 4 Minute Guide/Explanation
    Video: 3 1/2 Minute Guide/Explanation
    To turn this into a neutralizing technique, I examine where the negative core belief originated from (the past trauma).

  12. The Work created by Byron Katie
    Website Link: TheWork.com
    Demonstration Video: My Son Is Selfish
    Demonstration Video: My Brother Smokes In The House

    13. Part 1: Complaints List
    Part 2: One Belief At A Time
    Part 3: Judge Your Neighbor - 6 Statements
    Worksheet Link: All 3 Worksheets
    Worksheet Link: One Belief At A Time Worksheet
    Worksheet Link: Judge Your Neighbor Worksheet








MORE TECHNIQUES

Below are some neutralizing techniques that emerged organically for me from things I had read or heard or from other techniques that I used frequently.

The first one is a bottom-up approach and the rest are top-down.









BodyTalk

This technique can be done while walking, sitting or lying down.

One day, at work, I spontaneously did this while walking around doing my job, and it resulted in neutralizing an anchor.

I didn't even know I was upset about anything, when I started. I was simply checking in with my body.

This technique also works if I have a specific trigger in mind.

This technique is a bottom-up approach because it starts by focusing on a physical sensation in the body.
Sensations are connected to emotions and stories.

This is how the technique works:


Silently ask your body, "Hey, Body, how are you feeling?"

Your attention will naturally be drawn to a physical sensation somewhere in your body.
Allow yourself to fully feel this sensation...

As you give this sensation your attention, you start to notice an emotion.
Allow yourself to fully feel this emotion...

As you give this emotion your attention, a memory might surface.
Gently observe it...

This memory might be followed by others.
Follow this stream of consciousness,
Gently observing all the memories that come up..............

After a while, you begin to notice that this trip down memory lane is revealing connections between events in the past and recent events in your life...

You might see a lifelong pattern emerging...

A significant issue in your life is now being illuminated...

You can clearly see that an old program has been running on the hard drive of your subconscious mind.
You understand where this program came from and that it is no longer relevant or needed.
You can let it go now...

This old program is being uninstalled from your subconscious mind...

Your system is being updated...

You feel lighter... freer... perhaps even filled with joy....









Deeply Acknowledge

Ben Ralston says that trauma is about survival (safety).
He says that any being, when subjected to a perceived threat, reacts by trying to protect itself against the threat, trying to be safe, trying to survive.
To let go of trauma, Ben says we need to peel back the layers of safety we have been holding onto.
He says we can do this by deeply acknowledging the very first reaction we had.
Then we can complete the trauma instead of staying stuck in the survival instinct, which protected us at the time.

Ben talks about that in this 10-minute video:
How to release or let go of buried feelings and suppressed feelings?

My takeaway from what Ben says in the video is a technique I call "Deeply Acknowledge".


Option 1:
I think about what I feel upset about and then ask myself, What is the central problem?
Or What is the underlying fear beneath the problem?

Then I insert that problem or fear into the following two statements:

1. I deeply acknowledge the subconscious association between __________________ and lack of safety.

2. It is safe now to __________________.


Example 1:
The problem is my friend does not understand me.

  1. I deeply acknowledge the subconscious association between [not being understood] and lack of safety.
    Or I deeply acknowledge the subconscious association between [being misunderstood] and lack of safety.

  2. It is safe now to [not be understood].
    Or it is safe now to [be misunderstood].

Example 2:
The underlying fear is that I will be rejected.

  1. I deeply acknowledge the subconscious association between [being rejected] and lack of safety.

  2. It is safe now to [be rejected].
    Or I am safe now [even if someone rejects me].


Option 2:
I identify my survival reaction and insert it into the following two statements:

1. I deeply acknowledge the subconscious association between safety and __________________.

2. It is safe now to __________________.


Example 1:

  1. I deeply acknowledge the subconscious association between safety and [staying silent].

  2. It is safe now to [speak up].

Example 2:

  1. I deeply acknowledge the subconscious association between safety and [people-pleasing].

  2. It is safe now to [stop trying to please others].
    Or it is safe now to [focus on pleasing myself rather than pleasing other people].

These statements update my system, which changes my subconscious program/script.

This technique can sometimes stand on its own, but I almost always pair it with the Breaking Agreements technique below using the same issue (handle).









Breaking Agreements

I insert the issue (handle) into the following two statements:

1. I no longer agree that it is bad to __________________.

2. I no longer agree that I am bad if __________________.


Example 1:

  1. I no longer agree that it is bad to [be misunderstood].

  2. I no longer agree that I am bad if [someone misunderstands me].
    Or I no longer agree that I am bad if [someone does not understand me].

Example 2:

  1. I no longer agree that it is bad to [be rejected by someone].

  2. I no longer agree that I am bad if [someone rejects me].

Example 3:

  1. I no longer agree that it is bad to [speak up].

  2. I no longer agree that I am bad if [I speak up for myself].

Example 4:

  1. I no longer agree that it is bad to [be displeased].
    Or I no longer agree that it is bad for [others to be displeased].
    Or I no longer agree that it is bad if [someone is displeased with me].

  2. I no longer agree that I am bad if [I have displeased someone].
    Or I no longer agree that I am bad if [someone is displeased with me].

This technique was inspired by what I read in The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz.

To sum it up, when we were kids, many adults told us a bunch of untrue stuff in order to get us to behave how they thought we should.
I think most of these adults were well-meaning. Perhaps some were not.
Either way, by complying with what they said and trying to be "good", we essentially agreed with them that how we naturally were was "bad".

Now we can break all those agreements, freeing us to be who we really are, instead of how other people wanted us to be.

This technique can stand on its own or be added on at the beginning or end of any other neutralizing technique.









Protector Update

I once heard Thomas Hubl say that trauma freezes time, and that really stuck with me.

This technique evolved out of my understanding of that and of Parts (from Internal Family Systems) and repeated use of a reframing exercise called the Graduation Exercise.

I found that I can liberate the internal parts of me that stepped up to protect me long ago when I was a vulnerable child simply by verbally updating them.

When I discover a story or old belief or old strategy for meeting my needs that no longer serves me, but I can't seem to let go of it, then I know that a part of me is still using that story, belief or strategy to protect me.

I speak directly to this Protector part of me.

"Thank you for your dedicated service all these years.
You have shown tremendous perseverence in trying to keep me safe by ______________________________.
[e.g. driving me do everything in my power to get others to understand me, so they will like me - or at least not hate me]

That helped me survive in the dysfunctional environment I grew up in.

I am an adult now, and my life circumstances are very different now than they were back then.
I no longer need you to do this service anymore.

Thank you so much for all you have done for me!"









First Time (Vulnerable Child)

Thinking about a current triggering event, I ask myself a series of questions.

  1. What am I feeling?

    (At first, I needed to use a feelings list to help me identify my feelings.)

  2. When was the first time I ever felt this feeling?

    A. I acknowledge every experience that comes to mind.

    I wait for the first time to surface.
    Eventually something really old comes up (from my childhood), and I intuitively recognize it as the original, very first time.

    (I do not always need to have a direct memory of what happened, to resolve it. One time a story I was told about something that happened when I was two years old came to mind, and I immediately recognized that was the unresolved root trauma.)

    B. I give myself empathy.

    [e.g. "I was so young, when that happened! Of course I was overwhelmed! That was so difficult, confusing and painful for such a small child to deal with all alone!"]

  3. What unmet needs did I have at that time?

    I give myself more empathy.

  4. Why were my needs unmet?

    I examine what my child self's interpretation was of what happened.

    I re-evaluate what happened, applying my adult understanding to the situation.

    Knowing what I know now, as an adult, I examine what was going on in the lives of the adults around me at that time.

    I usually discover that I have been living with some unnecessary fear and erroneous beliefs about myself, other people, and the world as a result of my limited child-level interpretation of what happened.

    5. Increasing understanding decreases fear.

    Once my feelings about the root trauma are transformed, my feelings about the current event that triggered me automatically change, too.

This technique evolved from a little bit of knowledge I had about Teal Swan's Completion Process, a Vedic Completion Process, and something referred to as a Regression technique.









Experience De-Resonator

Once I have identified a past experience (my own or that of another) that I do not want to resonate or identify with anymore, I say a series of statements to clear away any residue (resonance).

Process Overview:
I state the experience (what happened), and then I say the statements listed below, pausing between statements for as long as I want to notice and reflect on whatever comes up.
Sometimes I pause for a few seconds, sometimes for several minutes. It is a very intuitive process.
I move onto the next statement when I feel complete with the current one.
Before moving on, I often jot down a few notes about what came up (sensations, emotions, thoughts, memories, images, insights, etc).


1. State the experience.

2. Say the Statements:

  1. Everything that led up to that happening happened.

  2. Everything that happened is over, and all the origins of it are healing now.

  3. I no longer resonate or identify with that (experience) or with anything that led up to it.

  4. All the places in me where that has been stored are healing now.

    I might add a variety of other statements here, if I feel like getting more specific.

    For example...
    All the places in my physical body - in my DNA, cells, bones, organs, hair - where that (experience) has been stored are healing now.
    All the places in my mental body - in my conscious mind & subconscious mind - where that has been stored, are healing now.
    All the places in my emotional body - in my chakras & auric fields - where that has been stored, are healing now.
    All the places in my causal body where that has been stored are healing now.
    All the places in my energy body where that has been stored are healing now.

  5. All the areas of my life that have been affected by that (experience) are healing now.

  6. All of my relationships that have been affected by that (experience) are healing now.

  7. All the effects that (experience) had on me are healing now.

In the process of doing this, I often have deeper insights into the causal factors of the experience and the effects it had on me.
I often get a sense that the patterns involved go back many generations.

This technique naturally evolved for me out of repeated use of the TAT™ (Tapas Acupressure Technique) mixed with some other energy healing modalities.













imovebeyondtrauma@gmail.com


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