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Welcome!

This website is a collection of what I have learned, and continue to learn, about resolving childhood trauma as an adult.

On my journey, I have found the following things to be true:

  • To resolve childhood trauma, I do not need to be able to remember the trauma - or even remember my childhood.
    I do remember most of my childhood, but I have met plenty of people, who do not, and they are still able to resolve their unresolved trauma.

  • In the process of resolving childhood trauma, I also end up healing generational trauma - personal and collective trauma that has been passed down through generations genetically or behaviorally in my family and in my culture.

  • Having support on this journey is essential.
    I am very self-reliant and can do a lot on my own, but self-reliance only goes so far. It has its limits. Receiving guidance and support from a professional is very helpful and, at times, absolutely necessary. I receive guidance and support from someone who had over 14 years of personal trauma integration experience when we started working together and had mentored many others before me.

  • Those of us with addictions, physical health conditions, or mental health conditions may need an expert in that condition to provide additional support and guidance on our trauma resolution journey.









What Is Trauma?

I have heard many definitions and explanations of what trauma is.

What it boils down to for me is that trauma is a reaction - an emotional upset. It is a response to an overwhelming distressing event.
(It is not the distressing event, itself.)

If someone is wondering if they had any trauma in their childhood, they can ask themselves, "Did I ever feel upset and overwhelmed about something when I was growing up? Did I ever experience an overwhelming distressing event during my childhood?"

I put distressing events into 3 main categories
(The first two come from Gabor Mate. I added the third.)

  1. Something bad happened that should not have

  2. Something good did not happen that should have

  3. Something bad happened that could be seen as a normal part of life
    (like falling off a bicycle or getting stung by a bee)


All humans experience trauma. The question is, Did it get fully resolved or not?









Alone

What prevents trauma from getting resolved?

Many experts agree that being ALONE with what happened is why our trauma did not get resolved.

Gabor Mate has said that what creates trauma is not the traumatic event itself, but being ALONE with it.

According to Lori Galperin, what really makes trauma "Trauma" is the reaction of the environment to an injurious experience that happened to us [at any age].
If the reaction of people in our environment ameliorates the effects of what happened, we can move through it and move on.
When their reaction exacerbates the problem or there is complete silence, then we are left to handle what happened ALONE.

Acccording to Teal Swan, as children, we could not find resolution [for our trauma] because we were left to handle what happened ALONE, and we were not equipped to handle it.
What is needed to heal trauma is to resolve it.

So, the crucial factor for children is whether or not they have support from a healthy adult to deal with and process the overwhelming distressing event.
Receiving adequate support can drastically change a child's reaction. It can help them make some kind of sense of what happened and feel safe again.

There are a wide variety of reasons why adults are not available to support a child.
They might be too disconnected, shut down, or emotionally immature due to their own unresolved childhood (or other) trauma.
There might be some form of environmental stress or internal stress or other distraction present - for example, poverty or illness - either on an ongoing basis or temporarily.

Those are probably the most common reasons.
The point is not to blame, but to simply acknowledge what happened, have empathy for our younger selves, and increase our understanding.
Compassion for ourselves and others comes from understanding.













imovebeyondtrauma@gmail.com


Disclaimers

The content on this website is for informational purposes only.

This website does not contain medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

The information on this website is not meant be used as a substitute for professional guidance from a doctor or other qualified healthcare provider.

References do not imply endorsement of any of the referenced person or entity's other material, ideas, beliefs, actions, or behaviors.